Working with 80 students in this two-and-a-half-month teaching sprint called the quarter system, I am left with little time to write. My last post on the Blog here was a few weeks ago and this feels like years ago. Just now, though, I’m starting to sense an ordinary pace to my life. Or what I mean is a safe rhthym. So much change in the last year was about swimming in new waters, but barely surfacing for air as menancing wave after surprise wave of difficulty appeared from no where.
Yesterday I went for a literal swim in a beautiful pool that I shared with only two other gym members. My lucky privilege always feels so spoily when I stare underwater at the clear blue walls shimmering with sunset streams of light. The water felt warm and I pulled strong through it feeling air cruise easily through my lungs. I felt strong. In many ways, as I enjoy an engaging life these days, I return to my body–the grace and energy of her. Routine exercise like this swimming steadies that energy and also develops my stamina. These swimming sessions help me practice adversity because the chilly San Francisco air stings shoulders and head above the surface, but underneath the warm water encourages me to glide through the water smoothly. I feel ready.
For example, I don’t consider what will happen tomorrow. I’m trying instead to easily show up for all those moments in the day that count. My mind is as clear as my body. For a while there, the relentless crashing waves gave me pause–could I see and swim to the top clear surface? I had some doubts. Not any more. I’m in a peaceful place of change and the dizzying, can’t-catch-my-breathe days are over. I will say humbly that I don’t believe they will ever return in this simple little life of mine. Just an intuitive guess made from under the water looking so clearly around at others swimming steady nearby.
